Welcome to Boomb Tube! Here we recap all of your favorite Cape Cartoons! This week, Ultimate Spider-Man throws a wacky house party! Will there be mischief? Probably.
So this week’s Ultimate Spider-Man started with Peter Parker fighting a guy named Grizzly whose power is owning a motorized bear suit. It takes Drake Bell Spider-Man literally 16 seconds from Grizzly’s introduction to say “YOU’RE BEARLY A CHALLENGE!” Then Peter and his friends defeat him and the audience is left to believe that the character of Grizzly was created specifically for this pun. We’re already off to a great start.
Back at the Parker Household, Aunt May is leaving for the weekend to fulfill her role as “Awesome Napoleon Dynamite Grandma” and so Peter’s team decides to hold an off-the-walls party! All the kids from school are invited and the gang is preparing by standing around in full costume(?!) and not actually preparing for the party. Nova and Drake Bell Spider-Man, however, do go into the basement to mess with SHIELD Security. Flash Thompson and other teenagers, wanting the party to start so they can score some choice pizza and soda pop, end up losing their patience. As a result, Flash puts his face near a security scanner while the security system is being hacked by Nova and the entire house goes into lockdown. The teenagers outside, meanwhile to continue to wait for pizza.
Drake Bell Spider-Man and Co. fight the SHIELD robots that spring up from the woodwork while Peter makes jokes about how Nick Fury is really bad at home renovation. This is followed by a twenty second long clip in which a chibi Nick Fury says “Yes at SHIELD Home Decorating we replace the dry wall with weapons.” I hate Ultimate Spider-Man. Eventually, the robots are able to be destroyed, and when Peter opens the door for the guests, the only remaining party goer is Flash Thompson who stayed specifically to tell Peter his party sucked. Then, Flash steals a lawn gnome before running away to his abandoned gas station home they established a few episodes ago. I love Ultimate Spider-Man.
Peter and Friends stand around the house which then collapses because robot attack. Worried about who will take the blame, Peter’s friends decide to confess to Aunt May until Peter says that it’s okay, he’ll talk to her. SHIELD then flies in with a replicated Parker house and just drop it in the middle of Queens with Phil Coulson inside. Phil says that SHIELD has plans for everything, including their security system going lethal apparently, and just nonchalantly throw a new house with none of its original posessions at Peter. He had his family heirlooms in there. Photos of Uncle Ben. Buried beneath this new, artificial lie.
But oh is Clark Gregg adorable. Coulson informs everyone that the Helicarrier is back up and as such Peter’s friends are to report back at once. Peter seems incredibly remorseful at the thought of his friends leaving them and being returned to the harsh foster care system run in place by a man modeled after Samuel Jackson. But then, Drake Bell Spider-Man screams out “NAH LOSERS! IGET MY OWN BATHROOM BACK!” Truly poetry for the ages.
Review Score: 4/10 – Same old Ultimate Spider-Man. Just bland and filled with awful puns.
