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Multiversity Casting Couch: S.W.O.R.D.

By | July 31st, 2010
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We all L.O.V.E.D. S.W.O.R.D. Why is “love” an acronym? For effect really; but the book was one of our favorites, and we all lamented its demise. It sort of had the same life as a show on FOX. Great concept, brilliant execution, and a rabid cult following. But that cult following didn’t blossom as well as it should have, and Marvel pulled the plug before it could really go anywhere.

But fear not! I too loved this book, and I decided I wanted to cast it. This one was kind of tough, because I did something I don’t normally do and I cast voices for a lot of the characters, since I see them being CGI before I see them as a guy in a suit.

So who did I cast? You’ll have to look beyond the cut! Do you have any other suggestions? Don’t be afraid to offer them in the comments!

Beast — Kelsey Grammer

Why change this? He was the best part of the abysmal X-Men 3 film. Beast is an overly intelligent scientist who is really refined despite looking like a feral creature. As a matter of fact, Hank McCoy might as well be Dr. Frasier Crane with a lot of blue fur. I really can’t argue with this casting.

Abigail Brand — Angie Harmon

You may remember her from Law & Order. Well, she has the look that will make you stand at attention and not want to mess up; for fear of her kicking you butt. So does Angie Harmon when she tries. And they’re both beautiful to boot.

Henry Peter Gyrich — Jack Coleman

On Heroes, Jack Coleman played Noah Bennett, the morally ambiguous government official who will adhere to whatever suits him at the time, all while protecting his family. Most of that can be said for HPG as well, and Jack Coleman looks nearly identical to him as well.

From here on it gets a little tricky. A lot of the characters between the covers of S.W.O.R.D. are not human, and they must be either puppets or CGI. From here on out I’ll be suggesting possible voices for the characters.

Death’s Head — voice of Bruce f’n Campbell

Why Bruce Campbell you ask? Why NOT Bruce Campbell?! I’m surprised I haven’t cast him in every single movie I’ve put together. Death’s Head, at least as Gillen wrote him, but this hardass yet sarcastic bounty hunter who is looking for Abigail Brand’s brother just needs a few vocal effects to make him perfect.

Lothi — voice of Will Farrell

In the comics, Lothi was a scoundrel at the very best. But he also had this sort of desperate overwhelmed vibe that made him a brilliant comedic foil for Abigail. And if you think about it, there’s no better comedic foil than Will Farrell. I think Will Farrell’s voice would brilliantly complement the character of Lothi.

Sydren — voice of Alan Rickman

For some reason, I just hear Alan Rickman’s voice when I read the character. Sort of that posh English Accent that just sounds annoyed at everything. I can’t explain it very well, but you really can’t go wrong with Alan Rickman either.

Unit — voice of Brent Spiner

Is this a little obvious? Maybe; I’ve been watching old episodes of Star Trek: The Next Generation and Spiner happen to be the highlight of the show, portraying vulnerability and a childlike wonder which is brilliant considering Data is an emotionless android. On the flip side, I think his voice can portray he needed level of creepiness to the character. Unit is a quite unsettling character, and the antithesis of Data in a lot of ways. It’d be an interesting tradeoff to see Spiner play the Anti-Data (that is not Lore)


//TAGS | Casting Couch

Gilbert Short

Gilbert Short. The Man. The Myth. The Legend. When he's not reading comic books so you don't have to, he's likely listening to mediocre music or watching excellent television. Passionate about Giants baseball and 49ers football. When he was a kid he wanted to be The Ultimate Warrior. He still kind of does. His favorite character is Superman and he will argue with you about it if you try to convince him otherwise. He also happens to be the head of Social Media Relations, which means you should totally give him a follow onTwitter.

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