We here at Multiversity get pretty excited about the holidays, and this year we’re sharing that excitement with the rest of you as we celebrate that wonder of wonders: THE HOLIDAY COMIC!
Each day for the next twenty-five days, and in no particular order, we’ll be featuring one yuletide yarn set to the tune of tidings of comfort and joy, and today we’ve got Christmas the way it was meant to be enjoyed — with blood, bullets, vengeance, and dudes in skull shirts. It’s the Punisher Holiday Special!
Day #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9, #10, #11, #12, #13, #14, #15, #16, #17
Who Did It? This adventure of yuletide joy is brought to you by Stephen Grant and John Hebert.
What Is It About? A violent jheri-curled mobster by the name of Little Tony is attempting to enact vengeance on the man who killed his father, Big Tony. After all, it is Christmas. Sending his man Rudy out to bring him the head of John the Baptist the Punisher, Rudy enacts out a devious trap to trick the Punisher by putting the word out that these evil, evil mobsters are going to take down a mall! On Christmas? How dastardly.
The Punisher makes his way to the mall, searching for these mobsters inconspicuously in a trenchcoat, skull teacher and beanie hat, the mobsters politely wait for the mall to close and all of the shoppers have gone home before hunting and chasing the Punisher through the mall. That’s what he gets for shopping for his loved ones the night before Christmas, I guess?
Suffice it to say, the Punisher shoots and kills everyone — and boy, do I mean everyone. He also blows up a car in the mall, killing six guys at a time, fills the mall with tear gas before teaming up with the one woman who apparently refused to leave the mall when it closed and was full of men with guns shooting at each other. He also stabs a guy with a reindeer set in what may be one of the best Christmas kills ever.
Of course, the grand moment of awesome for the Punisher is when he uses a Christmas tree as a weapon:
Which is followed by:
The Punisher runs out of ammo, and all is supposedly lost! But, wouldn’t you know it, the one woman who just still refuses to leave the mall saves him, giving him a gun and allowing him the opportunity to create one of the most dramatic assassinations he’s ever done.
Well, at least on a holiday, anyway.
There’s actually a second story in here as well, in which the Punisher fights a bunch of guys in the woods, but it isn’t ostensibly related to Christmas.
Is It Holiday Friendly? Well, let me ask you something. Did you think the movie Se7en was very Christmas friendly?
Me neither. But there are presents!
