Darkseid with his favorite plaything
For comic book fans, Twitter is a great place to get involved with the worlds that you love. Look at us – Matt received a direct message from Geoff Johns (leading to a geekgasm of epic proportions), Gil gets that much closer to his beloved Blair Butler, and I’ve managed to strike up conversations with various creators and celebrity comic fans. The community feel is pretty cool.
But none of that compares to the apex of comic cool on Twitter, and that is Darkseid Jenkins (@HoboDarkseid). Darkseid Jenkins is Grant Morrison’s Darkseid, except if he never tried to take over the world and was simply content with living in a dumpster while ranting and raving about various indicators of Anti-Life on Earth. It ends up being completely hilarious, until now: Hobo Darkseid hasn’t posted in 6 days and his last post was the ominous “FUCK YOU! I’M DEAD! FUCK YOU ALL!” The world of comics waits with bated breath as we try to figure out the mystery of his demise.
Whatever happened, we need to figure it out. The world without Anti-Life is apparently no world for me. His tweets were the equivalent of the helmets his minions would put on people to get them to submit to Anti-Life, as if he was commanding me to do things via Twitter.
Okay, maybe not, but they were pretty damn funny. Example, September 12th, the day before The Jay Leno Show premiere:
FUCK YOU, KANYE. TOMORROW DARKSEID UP THE STAKES: BEHOLD EVIL! BEHOLD RAMPANT AND UNIMAGINABLE DICKERY! BEHOLD… THE JAY LENO SHOW!
…UNSPEAKABLE AGONIES AWAIT… THE GRINDING OF THE SOUL AND IDENTITY INTO DUST BETWEEN THE WHEELS OF ANTILIFE… ALSO SOME “JAY WALKING”…
NIGHTLY HOUR-LONG DOSES OF ANTI-LIFE IN PRIMETIME? YES WE CAN! #JAYLENOISEARTHTALKFORANTILIFE
I mean come on…I always had the suspicion that Jay Leno was Desaad in disguise as a late night talk show host, but I’m finally getting the idea that I was right with these tweets. Of course, he even reveals what he is Omega Sanctioning now that he’s done with Batman:
DARKSEID COULD OMEGA SANCTION THE SHIT OUTTA SOME NACHOS RIGHT NOW NO LIE FOLLOW DARKSEID DIE FOR DARKSEID PROCURE YOU BLACK KING NACHOS
Most importantly though, we get the Darkseid we’ve all come to know and love in situations such as the one below, revealed through his opinion on misspelling words:
DARKSEID DOES NOT MAKE TYPOS. DARKSEID OBLITERATES THE SPELLINGS THAT MOST DISPLEASE HIM
Long story short, this guy is freaking hilarious. The fact that someone may have eradicated his glorious world of Anti-Life or at the very least may have sent a cease and desist to him to quiet his amazing tweets is upsetting. If I were DC, I wouldn’t have done that. I would have hired the guy to write a truly ridiculous Darkseid solo title on Vertigo. Tell me you wouldn’t read the adventures of Hobo Darkseid? SUBMIT.
