Well, it didn’t take too long for “Countdown” to get bad. As I’ve mentioned before, I’m trying to avoid an issue-by-issue breakdown of the series, because I don’t want “He wrote a million words about Countdown” on my tombstone, but issue #44 of “Countdown” deserves a special mention. It certainly isn’t the first bad issue of “Countdown,” but it is the first one I could describe via the phrase “absolute dog shit.” “Countdown” #44 is a dreadful comic, perhaps among the worst I have ever read (and I’ve read some stinkers in my time). Most of the story issues with this chunk of issues are particularly present in #44, but beyond that Adam Beechen’s script is a miserable bore and the line art by Carlos Magno and Jay Leisten is extremely unpleasant to the eye. The action is hard to parse, and the anatomy…well, let’s just say breasts don’t work like that. Were this a “real” review I’d go more into detail, but for now I’ll just leave it at this: my life is objectively worse for reading “Countdown” #44 and I hate that I can’t wait to read more like it.
Speaking of Mary Marvel’s anatomy, most of the issues of this batch (and particularly #44) are confirming that my fears from last week about how she would be portrayed were well-founded. Now that she is officially a “Bad Girl” there is no hesitation to display not-quite-upskirts or full upskirts at any possible opportunity. With the costume being black, you often can’t tell whether what you’re seeing is supposed to be shadow or not, and it’s hard to shake the feeling that it’s by design. Besides the fetishization of Mary, her moral transition is hard to parse. Narratively, I don’t get the feeling that this is supposed to have been some instantaneous thing; it reads like Black Adam’s powers are meant to have a slow corrupting effect on her, rather than just instantly turning her into a killer. This narrative thrust, however seems at odds with her considering murdering a guy for making a crude remark only to change her mind because there would be too much red tape only a couple issues after her transformation. It feels like the writing team wanted to get to “the good stuff” too much, though said stuff isn’t near as good as they thought it was.
Perhaps the strangest plot thread introduced in this batch of issues is that of the new (?) characters Forerunner and Monarch. Technically, the deadly assassin Forerunner was introduced in issue #46, having appeared in the last couple of scenes to kill Jason Todd and Donna Troy as the Monitors’ request, but this is where we first find out what her deal is…kinda. The strange thing is that Forerunner’s backstory is introduced and revealed to have been a lie in the span of a few pages. Her attack on Jason and Donna is interrupted by one of the “good” Monitors (later dubbed “Bob” by Jason), who she cannot attack due to a genetic fail-safe the Monitors had implanted in her race. Bob then reveals that although Forerunner believes she was an honorable warrior chosen by the Monitors for her strength, she was actually no more than an attack dog bred for their use. I need to emphasize that this is the first full issue with this character. Left behind on Earth by Bob, who takes Jason and Donna on a trip to find Ray Palmer, she is soon picked up by a mysterious new villain named Monarch, who looks significantly less cool than the Monarch of Venture Bros. fame.
The character-specific narrative so far is easily that of Jimmy Olsen. Jimmy finally realizes in these issues that he is manifesting superpowers and not just having bursts of adrenaline and does what any one of us would in his shoes: makes a dorky costume and goes about trying to make a name for himself as a superhero. It’s the kind of Jimmy story we get every decade or so, but it’s a fun one and certainly preferable to… whatever else is going on in this book. The nostalgic nature of it also makes it feel the most Dini-ish so far, and makes me wonder if it was an idea he had for a different book that DiDio convinced him to transplant to “Countdown.” These issues give direction to Holly Robinson’s arc: for now she is staying in an extremely fancy women’s shelter run by Athena (hello “Amazons Attack” tie-in!) that may have a secret dark side, besides simply harboring Harley Quinn. While it isn’t one of the worse ones just yet, this is another plot that I’m a bit leery of: a bunch of guys writing one of the first prominent lesbian characters in superhero comics in an Amazonian women’s shelter seems like a recipe for trouble, especially with what those same guys have been doing with Mary Marvel.
Continued belowAs mentioned last week, one of the biggest flaws of “Countdown” is its clumsy handling of the theoretically interesting idea of being a “DC Universe Weekly” type title. The Legion of Superheroes story continues to make no sense on its own, and my vague memories of “The Lightning Saga” can only carry me so far. Clearly something has happened between every scene where Karate Kid appears, but little to no information is given as to what that story is.
A similar problem besets the scenes with Pied Piper and Trickster. Last we saw them, they had been initiated back into the Rogues, who had a secret big job planned, and we now learn after the fact that this “job” ended up being the murder of Bart Allen, the current Flash. Thankfully this is handled a bit better than the Legion story; the scene opening with Piper and Trickster freaking out about having murdered the Flash has elements of Reservoir Dogs, and a later scene of them showing up to Bart’s funeral incognito to pay their respects is a pretty clever idea. However, before they even show up to the funeral we have about half a dozen pages devoted to the funeral as various characters give their eulogies to Bart. Bart has not appeared once in the pages of “Countdown,” nor have any of the eulogizers (at least, not in any speaking role). These five or so pages are meant to be emotional farewell to a fan favorite character, and Palmiotti and Gray do an alright job in that regard, but it is so disconnected from the actual events of the book.
I don’t want to be all doom and gloom though: this batch of issues also had my favorite one so far, #41. Weirdly, it was scripted by Beechen just like my least favorite, #44, so I don’t know what to make of that. It isn’t the writing that stuck out to me, though, but the art of Dennis Calero. I mainly know Calero’s work from the first few issues of Peter David’s “X-Factor” reboot, where he filled in for Ryan Sook. While most of the issues before have had the look of many comics of the era, Calero at least brought a somewhat interesting style to the book, with his heavy use of black ink. Looking at it in the light of day, rather than after having read four other issues, it is not nearly as good as I remember thinking it was but compared to the prior issues it felt bold and daring. Here’s hoping to see him again, if nothing else than to break up the monotony.
…I have consulted with ComicBookdb.com and learned that #41 is the sole issue Calero illustrated. So much for that idea. See you next week!
