Here I am, rocking you like a bunch of hurricanes with my five – non-bookreader, just show watcher – thoughts on this week’s Game of Thrones. Titled “The Bear and the Maiden Fair,” this episode is the story of the best and the worst of what the show has to offer, and a very hyper literal title at the same time. Let’s get to the thoughts, shall we?
Oh, and spoilers in case you have not watched this episode yet.
1. Kill Theon or Get Somewhere
Okay, this is getting ridiculous. The scenes with Theon either need to go somewhere or they need to stop. We get it. He’s being tortured emotionally, mentally and physically. We get it. He’s amongst people who are very familiar with who he is that hate him, and he has no idea who they are. We get it. Things are really bad for him. DO SOMETHING WITH IT. This is bar none the worst part of the show in its history, and its stank is infecting the rest of the show. It’s impossible to watch, at this point, and for the last fifteen seconds of his scene, I had the TV on mute. Because honestly, it’s just torture to watch at this point and the scenes add absolutely nothing to the story.
Get somewhere, GoT.
2. Jamie = the good guy?
Okay, that might be going too far, but is it just me or is Jamie Lannister somehow the guy that we unequivocally are rooting for this season? I mean, he is a freaking hero. If you could just omit him pushing Bran out of the tower in season one and being a general douche to Ned Stark, he might be the most well liked person in the show at this point. Hell, he might be anyways. Everything about him is completely engaging, and Nikolaj Coster-Waldau should be the front runner for GoT’s Emmy nominee list. Phenomenal work this whole season, and undoubtedly the best storyline rolling right now.
3. BEAR FIGHT!
Oh, and big part of the reason why we’re crazy about Jamie? HE JUMPED INTO A PIT TO GET BETWEEN A BEAR AND BRIENNE TO SAVE HER. He, the man with one hand, jumped into a pit to save a woman who previously held him captive from a bear! Man. What a scene that was, and it was just amazing to watch him get everything sorted and then stand up to Locke like he wasn’t twice as dangerous as the bear. MORE JAMIE AND BRIENNE PLEASE.
4. I’ll take gold out of the two gifts
In this episode, Dany tries to take out another town to free her future army – the slaves across the Narrow Sea – and in the process continues her march towards being the most epically badass character in the show. I mean, the confidence Emilia Clarke imbues in the character is stunning. It doesn’t matter who or what is in her path, Dany will find a way to get through it. In the scene that finds her squaring off against the emissary from Yunkai, she lets him know whose boss, keeps his gift, and let’s him know what’s what. Her reputation obviously precedes her, as the Yunkai are quite willing to give her one hell of a gift that could push her much further along her quest. But that’s not good enough, and I can’t help but think she’ll get what she wants eventually.
5. Moving pieces
As per usual, there were a lot of moving pieces in this episode, but I can’t help but think that as good and entertaining as this season has been, that not much REALLY has happened. Lots of declarations and posturing, but with just three episodes remaining, there needs to be some serious movement to truly merit splitting the third book into two seasons. Especially with the truly awful Theon plot rolling through and Bran’s story not really getting anywhere.
I’m hoping to close this season on a strong note, and the final three episodes need to start answering some questions and getting somewhere to feel like a truly outstanding season.
Final Verdict: 7.0 – A good episode with some major flaws
Continued below
We have five more thoughts on last night’s Game of Thrones, but as a reminder the second five thoughts contain massive spoilers. This half of the Game of Thrones review is mainly for clarification on certain things and general speculation about what this season is going to contain, designed for readers of the books in mind over folks who just watch the show. We will be covering material not seen on the show but seen by the end of “A Storm of Swords,” though, so please keep that in mind if you’re not fully caught up with this series or that particular book.
For the most part this just offers half of the show’s audience who read this site and have read all the books a place to say “OH, so THAT probably means THIS! AWESOME!” without spoiling anything for the other half. Everyone wins!
So, without further ado,
6. The Bear and the Maiden Fair
Oh, now you get it!
Last time we talked about “the Bear and the Maiden Fair,” we discussed the song and how it was actually a metaphor for various relationships in the series, including but not limited to Brienne and Jaime. The song itself is about a bear that saves a fair maiden (well, ok, it licks honey out of her hair, and also the licking part is kind of a euphemism, but you get it), with the bear then meaning anyone of large or grotesque stature saving or protecting someone who may not be able to save themselves. In the story, Brienne (who is supposed to be large and grotesque for a woman) saves Jaime (the fair maiden) from otherwise dark and suicidal thoughts in regards to his new handy situation. Here, Jaime (now grotesque due to his hand) saves Brienne (in the guise of a fair maiden) from an actual, literal bear.
You’re beginning to see how this all works, right? George RR Martin loves his motifs and metaphors.
But, that said?
7. The Most Blunt George RR Martin Has Ever Been
Here’s the thing about good ol’ Martin: in the book, he is the single most subtle and devious writer out there. Almost nothing is stated, not even that the sky is blue or that the grass is green. Every big and important detail is implied or inferred, mostly due to the fact that often times its actually a trick or a ruse. Unless you see it, you’re not supposed to believe it (and, honestly, even then…). Such is the case with Gendry, who we know is Robert Baratheon’s son due to dramatic irony, but nobody else really realizes — including and especially Gendry himself.
So color me shocked when Melisandre point-blank states who his father is. Woah. George, what are you doing?
It doesn’t end there, mind you. There are plenty of unsubtle moments in the episode. The castration of Theon, for example, was only implied in the book during a particular gruesome and disturbing scene. Here? Well. I’m sure quite a few people were uncomfortable and found it unnecessary. And they’re probably not wrong. It’s borderline torture porn out of context, and it’s 100% out of context now.
Still. That George RR Martin fella can write, huh? And, speaking of writing,
8. Still More New Stuff
Once again, we’ve veered off the path of the books and entered into largely new territory. There’s only one scene in this entire episode that’s reasonably familiar, and that’d be the bear pit scene — and even that’s different! (Spoiler alert: the bear was supposed to die.) It’s strange to see George RR Martin somewhat rewriting his own work, but at the same time, everything comes with a new light because George RR Martin is writing the episode.
Take, for example, the scene with Tywin and Joffrey. This never happens in the book; Joffrey is a largely disinterested king, more obsessed with himself than anything else. That entire scene represented something that I found particularly endearing about this episode and the fact that Martin was writing it, which is that we get to see a new side of “old” scenes. That and Charles Dance kills it as Tywin Lannister. This scene, while not present in the books, may be one of my favorite things Martin has written — at the very least, for the show.
Continued belowAll of the extra time with Jon and Ygritte as well as what happened to Osha to push her over the Wall (which, if I’m correct, we never did learn before she disappeared with Rickon — who, mind you, still has zero lines per episode) are also interesting to see as Martin develops these characters in different ways.
But the last thing that Martin does that’s particularly amusing in this episode is:
9. SO MUCH FORESHADOWING DIALOGUE
Honestly, it got to the point where I had to write it all down in order not to forget. Here are the lines in the episode, as written by the grand guru himself, all of which should have interesting pay-offs later down the road.
And, again, if you haven’t read the books and you’ve somehow chosen to read to this point, you might want to look away.
“Who are you writing?” – Robb Stark
“You won’t love him so much when you find out what he really is.” – Orell
“What would I do there? Juggle?” – Tyrion Lannister
“If you go to Castle Black, every one of you will die.” – Jon Snow
“There is power in a king’s blood.” – Melisandre
“Tell your king the Lannisters send their regards.” – Jaime Lannister
“Why don’t you buy a gold hand and shove it up your ass?” – Locke
We could go into what all of these are ostensibly in reference to, but I’m sure book readers get it. The rest of you who have wandered down here? Heh. You’re on your own.
10. The Bear Pit
The last thing I want to touch on is the big part of the episode. If I can get rid of the “here’s the book connection” for a minute, I’d just like to say that I was a bit disappointed with it. It wasn’t bad, per se, but I remember being so much more into the book’s rendition of the scene — Jaime’s interactions with Vargo (“Locke”), how he jumps in to save Brienne and immediately quotes GOB Bluth in his mind, and how they’re saved at the last second by some arrows into the bear itself. The scene felt much bigger in the book; here it felt a tad rushed, sort of jam packed into the last few minutes due to so much other stuff being in this episode.
This is the plight of the book reader. We know what has happened, we know what will happen so our expectations are insanely high. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one let down by the bear pit, but it’s a very small qualm for an interesting episode.
And, really, how likable has Jaime become? He was likable before for being such a rogue, but you really have to love him for saving Brienne. You really have to.
Cheers to Little Bart the bear for such a fine performance as well.
