Huff some hemlock and then huff some glue- it’s time for some more Preacher y’all! Here we are once again, barreling through season three. Nice to have you with me. In a world where god is a dalmatian man and the messiah is an inbred idiot, it’s good to have a pal to share some laughs with. This season is shaping up to be a hell of a thing and I’m with ya ’til the end of the world dear reader. The end of the world. Let’s see what’s in store for us in season three, episode three, “Gonna Hurt.” Last week was rough, but I’m sure nothing bad will happen this week.
1. “It was by design”
And a hearty welcome back to God, who now looks exactly like Fake God. Why? Because it was by design. That’s some BS, but it’s pretty consistent BS with how God has acted on this show thus far.
Tulip and God are not buds. You can tell because she talks about kicking God’s ass/kicking God in the dick the entire episode. One the one hand… what? This goes sort of unexplained. God is annoying sure, but he hasn’t done anything in particular that has harmed Tulip. On the other hand, Tulip has a real anti-authority streak, and God is the ultimate authority. It makes sense. The search for God is the driving arc of the show, and while everyone else is distracted by petty feuds, Tulip has her eye back on the ball. Plus I’ve spent God knows how many episodes complaining about Tulip getting sidelined [God’s note: it’s been ten] so I like tying her to the most important conflict of the story. Ruth Negga is too good an actress to keep staring sadly into the middle distance.
2. Who doesn’t love a bit of hemlock?
TC and Cassidy on the other hand, are buds. They share drugs and stories, and TC lovingly operates on Cassidy and offers him some swamp consomme, which I gotta figure is delicious to a vampire as it seems to be 80% gator blood. Considering how much of a drag Cassidy has become with the other two leads, it’s nice to have someone new for him to bounce off of. Whenever he’s with Tulip, he’s badly pledging his love (you’d think he’d have more game than that) and whenever he’s with Jesse, he’s acting like a bratty middle schooler. Any opportunity for Cassidy to do drugs and talk about weird crap is better than the alternative.
3. Just like old times
Jesse took a bit of a break from the spotlight this episode, which ended up being a good thing. He really screwed the pooch (made love to the dalmatian?) last week, and he needed a time out. He spent this week on a recruiting run with Jody, shedding some light on how Angelville operates. It’s shady AF. The two of them roll around to the most vulnerable people in the world and try to rope ’em into voodoo contracts. They go to a drug support group at a church and attempt to get a weeping glue huffer to sell his soul to Gran’ma. Jesse has lost his superpowers and his touch, and the guy decides to go to Madame Boyd instead.
In the car, we also get some gentle insight into Jesse and Jody’s relationship. Well, it’s gentle for us. Jesse gets an elbow to the face. It seems that Jody was in love with Jesse’s mother, which is not a surprise at all. Knowing Jody, his love was nothing wholesome. Dominic Cooper gets one of his few acting moments in the episode. “One of these days Jodie,” he growls. “But not today,” is Jody’s response.
4. Jody the vampire slayer
A lot of the interpersonal conflict on Preacher is desperately waving around the idiot ball. Cassidy is in love with Tulip and mad at Jesse. How does this manifest? He says it all the time. Jesse tells Cassidy that he’s his best friend which is sad, because Cassidy is kind of a dick, and Cassidy throws it back in his face. Jesse’s real concern is that if Jody and TC find out that Cassidy is a vampire, they’re going to string him up. Cassidy also throws this back in Jesse’s face.
So when TC and Jody find out Cassidy is a vampire, I don’t really know what to feel. Cassidy was flaunting his supernatural powers and Jesse was torturing him to help him hide. It all had the same result: Cassidy hanging from a tree. At the last minute Jesse decides to take Cassidy down to the Tombs we’ve heard so much about. Jesse puts on a bitching top hat, and we end with Cassidy locked in gladiatorial combat against the immortal pedophile science teacher. It’s one of those Preacher moments that have muddled emotional stakes but makes for good enough TV that I’ll keep on tuning in.
5. Voodoo Child
Fortunately, the real star of this episode is Tulip, and as I said earlier she’s finally being proactive. After letting TC show her his dingle (ew) (ew ew ew), she learns a little bit more about curses and voodoo and all the bad business our heroes have found themselves in. Unfortunately, a whole lot of this episode is Tulip, with no dialogue, poking through weird shit. The set dressing is incredible, but please someone give Ruth Negga a partner to act against.
She discovers something she continues to refer to as ‘blood compact napkins,’ so that’s what I’m going to call them, and investigates the path to Jesse’s freedom. The trail leads her to Madame Boyd, a rival voodoo witch. Because this is a Tulip story, the clue hunt devolves into a heavy metal brawl, but that suits me just fine. After some nifty stunt-work, Tulip and Boyd seem to be working together to bring down Angelville. Now that’s what I call some forward momentum!
