Study up on some fake science, and drink the blood of a vampire- it’s time for some more Preacher y’all! Here we are once again, barreling through season three. Nice to have you with me. In a world where god is a dalmatian man and the messiah is an inbred idiot, it’s good to have a pal to share some laughs with. This season is shaping up to be a hell of a thing and I’m with ya ’til the end of the world dear reader. The end of the world. Let’s see what’s in store for us in season three, episode eight, “Tom/Brady.” Last week was rough, but I’m sure nothing bad will happen this week.
1. Runnin’ with the Devil
There’s a fakeout at the beginning of this episode that really made me nervous. It seemed like the show was going to skip right past the Japan heist and go right on back to Angelville. That would be preposterous, because a Japanese heist is exactly the sort of shenanigans I want from Preacher. Fortunately, it was a dream sequence, but the fact that I was so worried is telling as to how much the show has been willing to drag.
Nope, it was all a dream. Gran’ma was having a nightmare and we even saw a guilt projection of Boyd, who I thought we would never talk about again, so that’s something. It also turns out that Gran’ma and Satan are old buds. See, that’s what I’m all about! I want that show. But as it stands, they have a pretty standard devil deal going on. He gives her life, she collects souls. I hope we get more of them hanging out.
2. Hoover: A man of many faces
None of us really believe in Hoover. He’s an eternal screwup, and he has ruined everything he’s touched. But this was weirdly his episode. First there was his Rasta disguise, which was terrible and I loved it. Then there was his vampire slayer kit, which was honestly kind of impressive, but he was immediately captured and threatened with death by Wicker-Man-bee-mask (Kev is a beekeeper you see). And then I was like no way, are we really going to turn Hoover into a vampire. Really? Really!? We did.
Amazing.
3. What do you call a vampire-vampire?
We also iron out some of the details as to how Eccarius has such funky superpowers. It’s because not only is he a vampire… he’s a vampire who eats other vampires! There’s gotta be a word for that right?
We had all the pieces, and so did Cass. Right before Eccarius ate Hoover, Cassidy intervened, letting my new favorite character escape. Unfortunately, this brings their budding romance to a bloody halt. It was sweet while it lasted. Now it’s tense as hell. And speaking of hell…
4. “Time to check your browser history”
The Japan heist was pretty aight. The cinematography was stylish and fun. There was a prolonged sexual harassment joke that mostly landed. What really made it work though were the great heist dynamics. Tulip having to work with her nemesis Featherbottom was great, and having Jody around led to some fun hulking old man physical comedy bits. There was some back and forth, some light groping, some murder with a hammer, some hacking the mainframe, some crossword puzzles. It was a heist! I love heists.
It ends with a hilarious case of mistaken identity. Satan wants Tulip in his clutches, but his demon is bed at recognizing humans. She nabs Featherbottom instead. But right when Tulip realizes Featherbottom had the briefcase full of souls, she’s loaded onto a bus with the Saint of Killers, Arseface, and Adolf Hitler. Power team right there.
5. Thomas Jefferson + Wayne Brady.
Over at Grail HQ, Jesse has no compunction in killing the All-Father, but you know what? That fat bastard is too fat to shoot. He lives and Jesse is attached to a Genesis harvesting machine. That’s when the wacky superscience kicks in, and it is high level weird.
The All-Father has his evil scientist inject clones of Humperdoo with the DNA of different famous people. The goal is to combine the perfect balance of good and bad so that genesis can thrive. They try everything, including Serena Williams and Louis XVI to make the ultimate human. None of it works until they try a combination of President Thomas Jefferson and the lovely Wayne Brady to make the ultimate speciman. Now Genesis is going to go into the body of the real messiah.
Oh, and the All-Father is keeping Jesse’s soul up his ass, so we have that to look forward to.
