Welcome one and all to Multiversity’s very own ‘Witching Hour,’ in which we take a look at Netflix’s The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina. Join me every Monday for your weekly recap. Last week shit went bananas when Sabrina took three arrows to the chest and then slaughtered the angelic witch hunters. This week we see Sabrina deal with those actions.
1. Like Unto A God
After saving the day last week, Sabrina is rushed into the infirmary, where Hilda is already having difficulty stitching up one of her family members. Harvey, a master word smith tells everybody that she was “flying and she was… different.” I’m slow clapping for Harvey’s explanation of events. Sabrina’s resurrected classmates share what really happened, that she was killed and rose from the dead, that she burned the angels and brought them back to life. Poor Harvey, always in over his head with magic.
But hey, for those of us who read comics, we’ll get his analogy about the Dark Phoenix. It’s Harvey, so its a pretty dumbed down version of what happens in the comics, but at least no one will have to go see Dark Phoenix when it opens in theaters this summer.
The truth is Sabrina has no idea why she was brought back. Even by asking Harvey what happened makes it seems Sabrina has little recollection of the events that transpired. Oh yeah, Sabrina heals Ambrose by simply telling him he’s healing. But as she tells Salem, this stuff always happens for a reason. The Dark Lord has bestowed these powers upon her for a purpose, and she’s aware that magic always comes with a price. We see Sabrina change the weather from raining “cats and dogs” to a beautiful sunny day. She cures Roz of her blindness. She’s not even thinking about what the cost of all this power will be. Classic Sabrina.
2. The Blackwoods Return
Because of the attack, Father Black… I mean His Unholy Eminence, the new interim Anti-Pope, has returned from the Necropolis with his new wife, who is oddly dressed in color. Woah. Just as Sabrina and Blackwood are about to throw down, the Unholy Council interrupts and eases the tension to discuss what actions to take.
By the way, Zelda has been changed into a Stepford Wife. She’s submissive, refuses to go by her own name “Call me Lady Blackwood,” and idolizes her new husband assuring Hilda that His Unholy Eminence will handle the Spellman’s current plight. We all know what Blackwood intends to ruin the Spellman family as they are his greatest threat to the power he covets so much. It’s fun to see Miranda Otto so bubbly, but also kind of disturbing. Where’s the quippy Zelda that I love to hate, damnit? Turns out, Zelda was being mind controlled and Hilda (as always) comes to her rescue.
3. Witches 2.0
Sabrina has suffered a trauma and came out of it with some badass new powers. She carelessly jumps to the conclusion that because she’s not like any other witch, she is special enough to be the one to unite witch and mortal kind. It’s her sacred prerogative to spread the Good Word of her father’s gospel. Only that’s not true is it?
Sabrina has no recollection of events, right? She doesn’t remember saying she was the Dark Lord’s sword. At her lunch table, she basically starts a new sect in the Church of Night that is all about witches and mortals coming together. When Prudence questions her, she displays another “miracle” as she makes rose petals rain down in the churches halls. So once again, without any caution, Sabrina jumps recklessly into the unknown, thinking that she knows how everything will turn out… She doesn’t. Clearly, the Dark Lord has other plans. Sabrina wants to “share her gifts with mankind.” Her romanticized ideologies certainly sound great, but it’s one thing to convince a couple of witches and warlocks who were resurrected, and another to change the minds of magic users worldwide.
4. On the Chopping Block
Before Hilda saves Zelda from Blackwood’s spell, Zelda goes to the Spellman residence and kills a newly ressurected Leviathan, who would have testified on Ambrose’s behalf. Zelda reveals Blackwood’s plan. Zelda warns that if Sabrina displays her powers, the council will undoubtedly execute her next. On the eve of his execution, Ambrose receives a visitor. Prudence comes to ask of Sabrina’s new powers, maybe showing some doubt in her father.
Continued belowUnable to produce their star witness, Ambrose is sentenced to die. Just as the guillotine falls, Ambrose is spared and the exectioner’s head rolls off. Zelda takes a trick from Ms. Wardwell, using a a voodoo doll.
When Blackwood tells Sabrina to carry out the execution, the Dark Lord himself appears, calls Blackwood a pretender, calls him petty and pardons Ambrose.
5. Tunnel Thirteen
While Sabrina throws a “coming out” party for the witches and warlocks in Greendale, Harvey and Theo explore the Kinkle Mines. Harvey tells Theo that he’s heard a voice from tunnel thirteen that literally says “Keep Out.” After some research, Harvey and Theo venture into the mines to see what is hidden. A monster attacks Harvey and Theo kills it with an axe.
Just as Sabrina is about to wow the mortals and witchkind with a miraculous flight, Theo and Harvey stop her and take her to the Kinkle Mines. In Tunnel Thirteen a prophecy is painted on the wall showing Sabrina in her crown of thorns and the episode closes by Sabrina truly understanding her gifts. She’s the herald of hell. She’s evil.
Meanwhile, Ms. Wardwell kills a man as a sacrifice, pulls out her own rib and creates a monster called Adam. He will do her bidding, which at this point seems to be killing Sabrina.
That’s it for this week folks. Come back next time to see how Sabrina deals with these shocking revelations and if Wardwell sends her new pet to attack Sabrina and her friends.
