The bad luck train keeps on rolling. Vagrant Queen episode seven finds our gang of unfortunates stranded without a ride. Time to hop on the Sunshine train and relieve their impounded shuttle. I personally would have left that heap to rot and hijacked a new ride, but that’s me, and I am smarter than them. Being scammed onto a train seems like an excellent way to stumble into a new adventure. So here we are.Minor spoilers ahead.
1. There is something about Amae
Since her introduction, Amae has been portrayed as a ladies lady. The fanciful mistress who exited her shop upon Amae’s opening is proof enough. The ladies love Amae. Even Elida is smitten by Amae’s bubbly charm. It’s no more evident than the random Sunshine Train passenger trying to get her some Amae. I mean, good fo there. Many people can say things like that never happen to them. Amae has that it factor. You have to have something special if you are pulling tail in full coveralls. I know I can’t pull that look off. Granted, I can’t pull most looks off. I’m no Amae.
2. One step forward, one step back
Elida has gone from Scavenger to freedom fighter, back to Scavenger. It seems like she continually takes one step forward and one step back. She’s in the same place she was at the start of the series, and we are creeping up on the season finale in a few weeks. I fail to see any forward momentum in Elida’s character growth. Other than realizing she digs Amae, or that she can’t quit Issac (we will get to that in a minute), the only thing that has changed is her fleeting interest in kicking Lazaro in his prim, buckled ass. For someone with so much going on, she sure is stuck in the same damn place. Right down to that goofy-ass ship that either doesn’t work or gets stolen. They all keep ending back at square one. That ship really is haunting them, I swear. You just can’t get rid of it. Or Issac. Or terrible jokes for that matter.
3. Jumping off a train was never so easy
A few people dive off a train in this episode. One of them an elderly lady with a comically large purse. The others being out heroes. At no point is anyone injured or scratched from diving off a moving train. A moving train that is also on an elevated platform around 20 feet in the air. They just get up, dust themselves off, and continue on their way. I once fell off the edge of my couch. Maybe 2 ½ feet to the ground. I was incapacitated for 20 mins, and I still have a limp. No way Issac’s clumsy ass didn’t straight up die from a bruised knee after that jump. That train is also going really fast. We never get to see any of the folks land on their feet, but I am assuming they didn’t tuck and roll. Blah, blah, blah, everyone is dead, and you know it. Jumping form a train… I will forgive a lot of things, but that? Nah.
4. Why is ancient tech always better than current advancements?
You ever notice how advanced ancient technology always turns out to be? Every sci-fi show has some old piece of tech or magic that is far superior to anything in the current time. The Sterzad is this series version of that. Lazaro needs the knowledge of a bunch of old something-ologists to harness its devastating power. My question is, isn’t there anything created recently in whatever-the-hell galaxy they are in, that can do what he needs? Have there been no advancements in terrible technology over the years? It’s always some old thing maybe by a forgotten race that everyone is trying to use to take over whatever for god knows what reason. Someone do a story where they get the ancient doodad, then some other bad guy walks in with a cool ray gun and disintegrates everyone. Then it’s over because super cool ray guns always win. There are no ancient races necessary in that plot.
5. Elida is in an abusive relationship
Continued below
Elida’s entire journey seems centered around being a bad judge of character. All the people she trusts end up dicking her over, especially Issac. We know they had a history that culminated in them splitting up. Then they get back together, only to have Issac screw her over again, having her lying older buddy die in the process. After a short time to really digest how toxic that relationship is, Elida realizes she doesn’t like to be alone, so she might as well be with the people who keep hurting her. This is a terrible relationship. Get out, woman. Even Amae isn’t worth the hassle. Issac says he’s 2.0, but a lot of upgrades are usually the same shit with one new feature and a bunch of unfixed nonsense. Ever update your phone, and after all the time it took to turn back on, everything besides the font is the same? That’s Issac. Wake up, Elida. You were out, and you pulled yourself back in. Ugh. I have to watch real people do this. Now I get to watch it happen in a galaxy that isn’t mine.
The wrap-up
Everything is resolved, everyone loves each other again, and the team is ready to band together to stop Lazaro. How you ask? Who knows. My guess is Elida is immune to that green, glowing McGuffin so she will be able to punch Lazaro in the nose, repeatedly and without hesitation. To be frank, I am glad they wrapped up all the melodrama in one and a half episodes. It wasn’t going to lead to any game-changing character growth since the group needs to deal with Dictator Lazaro and his terrible haircut. That’s not a dig, he literally hated his hair in the episode. There were some bright spots, like the kick-ass Sunshine train logo, or the strange punk rock lizard man. Let’s just go beat up Lazaro, please. Till next week folks, check your galaxy.
