Order some sushi and pop in some plastic fangs- it’s time for some more Preacher y’all! Here we are once again, barreling through season three. Nice to have you with me. In a world where god is a dalmatian man and the messiah is an inbred idiot, it’s good to have a pal to share some laughs with. This season is shaping up to be a hell of a thing and I’m with ya ’til the end of the world dear reader. The end of the world. Let’s see what’s in store for us in season three, episode seven, “Hitler.” Last week was rough, but I’m sure nothing bad will happen this week.
1. Hitler sandwich
Man, it took until the fourth to last episode to reintroduce Hitler. He’s in the opening credits and everything, so there’s a bunch we could have assumed before even meeting him. ‘Ol Adolf is going by “David” now, and working the counter at a sandwich shop. He keeps it together, except when he doesn’t, and he delivers insane German monologues about purification. So business as usual.
Until Eugene and the Saint of Killers show up. That ends with Hitler in chains being led back to Hell. Come to think of it, Eugene was in chains too. Damn. Things are looking pretty bleak for those two. Of course, one of them is Hitler so… Roll opening credits.
2. Funeral for a frenemy
Madame Boyd is dead. She gets a bayou funeral. Then she’s never mentioned again, and we’re probably not going to talk about her ever again. So… yay? Honestly she seems like a diversion and a complete waste of a character. Most of what goes down at Angelville this week was pretty boring. Herr Starr showed up. Jesse’s Gran’ma empties a catheter onto his shoes. There’s plotting, and scheming, and cajoling. Other characters are going to do stuff. It’s a whole bunch of setup.
Seriously, I checked my notes to discover I wrote: “TC had a hat once. A stinky possum hat.” That was probably the highlight of that part of the story.
3. Tulip’s Three
Meanwhile, Tulip, Featherbottom, and Jody are doing another heist- an international one! They’ve got to go to Osaka and retrieve souls for Gran’ma. Unfortunately they get as far as the airplane, and the rest of this story is going to be continued. So… that’s exciting! I’m looking forward to that!
Tulip has to put on one of those white Grail suits and… she actually looks really nice. I have nothing mean to say. Ruth Negga wears the hell out of a red blouse and a white blazer.
4. Hoover’s Big Adventure
I knew Hoover couldn’t do anything right, so power to this episode for building me up enough to believe that maybe he could pull something off. After using a secret confession booth to contact a gang of homicidal Catholic clergy, Hoover commissions the death of Eccarius and the kidnapping of Cassidy. His gang of vampire slayers includes a nun who works out in full habit, so I’m down for all of these shenanigans.
As it stands, the plan does go sideways. The hunters use huge sunlamps to try and zap the vamps, but Eccarius uses his crazy vampire powers to turn into a mouse and get away. Cassidy gets hit with a ton of tranq darts, but the second he did I muttered to myself, “That’ll never work. He’s probably built up a tolerance to tranquilizers.” And I was right! Ha!
5. Vampire Embassy Suites
When I saw the matching twin coffins, I was feeling like this episode was getting sort of queerbaity. Needless to say, I was very surprised with where it went. It turns out Eccarius has been turning his disciples and sending them around the world to set up vampire embassies to make the world a safer place for the children of the night.
After another wacky night of vampire superpowers and hypnosis, Eccarius and Cass barely survive Hoover’s attack. Then they totally make out! Like, for realsies! Huh. By the end of the episode, they’re knocking boots in a shared coffin. Good for them!
…sort of. See, it turns out the vampire embassy thing is fake. Eccarius turns people and then brutally murders them. So he’s even worse than he seemed, and Cass is gonna be none too happy when he finds out. That takes a lot of fun out of their romance, but I can’t argue with heightened dramatic stakes farther down the line.
As with everything in this episode there was a lot of table setting, and a lot of promise that things will get interesting later.
