Welcome back all you Supergirl fans! How was your summer? Was it restful? Were you on the edge of your seat, wondering how Lena would go full hell turn and how J’onn’s brother(?) was fitting into the road to “Crisis?” No? You totally forgot? Don’t worry, this episode will beat it back into your head from the recap onwards.
That’s right, season five is upon us, about a month later than I originally thought, and it’s not exactly engendering the same level of confidence as last season did. But hey, it could be worse. They could really throw a character under the bus for the sake of “DRAAMMMAAAAA.”
. . .I just jinxed things, didn’t I?
And as always, spoilers ahead.
1. Tis the Season TM
Despite the metric fuck-ton of things to talk about with this premiere, I wanted to start this out by saying that SJ Johnson’s Glade candles are advertising their Christmas/Winter line of scents. For a reminder, because I incredulously looked at my watch when I saw this, we are LESS THAN ONE WEEK INTO OCTOBER. We haven’t even had time to prepare for the nation’s collective masquerade party, let alone have it’s wake, before welcoming in the cold weather and nog.
This is why I don’t watch commercials anymore y’all.
2. The Fourth Estate? Oh, You Mean My 7 Acre Home in the Cayman Islands
OK, let’s kick things back into high gear with the show you all came here to hear me gripe about and occasionally praise. First point of order, as with all new seasons, we have a new status quo to contend with and upend in the most minor of ways. In a reflection of Bendis’ current “Action Comics” (Go read that shit, it’s some of the best Superman we’ve gotten in years), CatCo has a new owner who has less than altruistic intentions for the company.
In a more real world parallel, this represents the disturbing trend of billionaires and business people gobbling up huge media corporations, pulling the teeth and the funding of the journalists in order to push more palatable (read bland & milquetoast) articles that are geared more towards making money for them, rather than being a news and journalistic agency. There’s a lot that can be done here with this and I’m cautiously optimistic that Supergirl will try to discuss the role of news & journalism in a modern world but I’m pretty sure it’ll either be way to simplistic or overshadowed by the superhero stuff — this just isn’t the place to have an in-depth discussion about the purpose of a news organization in an age when the what of the news is readily available from decentralized sources and the challenges of producing revenue in that environment.
What I’m saying is, it’s easy to see why the new boss is going to be a major antagonist with how she represents “new media” and the relentless drive of large-scale capitalism to devour everything human in search of a quick buck but I’m afraid they’re going to lose that for the easier path of bashing everything except “traditional, newspaper-style reporting,” a reverse of
Snapper Carr’s introduction, though handled a lot better than that whole thing.
3. New Costume, Who Dis?
Another new change, in a much hyped reveal that was ruined by all the trailers, we got a new costume and haircut for Kara. She’s got bangs! BANGS! It’s a look that will take some time for me to get used to but more importantly, the new suit has pants! And. . . uh, more. . .red? And. . .um. . .
. . .Look, I didn’t notice anything different about this costume other than the pants. They current TV trend for these suits is to make them as militaristic as possible and suck the comic-bookiness out of them so when we get a change, it doesn’t feel super radical. That said, The CW has done a hell of a better job than the DCU at bringing these costumes to the screen. Is it too much to ask for some yellow on this costume? Or some more flair? Or bright colors?
4. We Always Thought it Was Going to Be Man Vs Mutant, We Never Considered The Machines Would Take Over
Continued belowBecause I wasted my first thought on that stupid, stupid Glade commercial, I’m going to combine these two thoughts. First off, this season is going to see the return of Brainiac, Querl Dox’s ancestor, and if not, HOPE, Lena’s AI is almost certainly going to play a major part. It feels too telegraphed with Lena’s comment about HOPE becoming “smarter and smarter” and Brainy vocalizing his fears from last season. If there’s one thing I’ve learned about Supergirl, it’s that they’re not very subtle about set-ups and that all emotions must be vocalized in large speeches.
That said, if this is the long-game, I applaud them for laying the seeds rather than throwing random powers at us (I’m still not over Supergirl being saved by the power of plants.)
Point of order two also has to do with Lena, but more specifically with her Heel turn. It began at the end of the last season, but I am of two, maybe even three, minds with how they handled it here. For one, the tearful confession by Melissa Benoist should have been in the finale, no ifs, ands or buts about it. That is a season ending performance and speech which Benoist absolutely kills in that scene — seriously, the highlight of the episode by far. However, opening the new season on it felt off, like it was a carry-over that could not fit before. The thematic relevance of telling the truth is fine but it would have resonated more last time, when we were dealing with the fallout of betrayal and escaping your destiny.
Instead, we get. . .well, whatever this episode was. What have they done with Lena? This was a character whose whole journey was to prove that she was not her family, that she was better than them and that what they said about her was not true. Now? She throws around lines like, “I’m a Luthor. Luthor’s are scorpions.” It comes across as disingenuous and a turn that comes from needing a new evil Luthor after they killed off Lex and got rid of her mom rather than any sort of character change.
The feeling of betrayal was well established and so her rage and anger informs her decisions but this was her best friend. She is the kind of character to confront her problems and then cut ties rather than stew with evil plans. And she has very few legs to stand on with the amount of secrets she’s kept! It’s frustrating to watch. But then they seem to resolve it this week, which I’m OK for if it puts this whole stupid plotline behind us. There could be an interesting relationship between the two, now that’s its been strained, and the attempt to rebuild trust being worked into their upcoming interactions. That’s what’s going to happen right?
. . .Of course not. Of course they’re sticking with the Lena going full Lex and waiting to screw Kara over for, what, revenge? Why is she still going forwards on this with such fire? Her being totally fine would be just as contrived but she shows no sign of wavering after the curveball at the Pultizers. On the one hand, it is a curveball and it’s nice to see them not resolving a plot in one episode but on the other hand, I hate the road to this moment.
Maybe we’re meant to read this as her trying to justify her moment of forgiveness, of being touched by Kara’s humanity and the pain she was clearly feeling and the difficulty of her coming forwards. I can see all that, and I do hope they go the more nuanced route of Lena being more and more conflicted in her plans as the season goes on, the former may be a fruitful avenue to explore, but it’s not one I’m particularly interested in watching.
The creators seem to want these two at odds all the time, which is boring and has been the entire time, both when Kara was the one being a snob, when Lena was being an ass, and when they both were keeping secrets from the other. It’s cheap drama and the show deserves better.
Continued belowSpeaking of Comic Book Weirdness and cheap drama, J’onn J’ones has another Martian plot to keep him occupied instead of letting him be a detective, the COWARDS. Yeah, I was also kinda bored watching Midnight and Creepy Child fight the crew. It was a distraction from the far more interesting interpersonal drama. Yes, despite my comments above, I found myself wishing to jump back to Kara hemming and hawing about telling Lena, as infuriating as it was to watch, every time Midnight or the Creepy Child was on screen. I dunno why but it just didn’t capture my attention, even with the super badass trailer shot of all the heroes fighting. In fact, that whole final fight felt like something out of a different show. Maybe Supernatural.
Oh, OH! And that last fight! The magic portal of MacGuffin-ness would have made for a great excuse to completely change the status quo on us! Dump J’onn and Kara, like, 6 months into the future as a result of her recklessness and see the aftermath, wouldn’t that be different? Wouldn’t it be nice to see consequences for actions? (Shhh, I recognize the hypocrisy after the last point.) Bah. Instead, we’re gonna get something weird with the brother.
Oh, and Brainy continues to be the best in the show.
That about does it for now! What did I get wrong about this premiere? Were you as frustrated at Lena as I or do I have it totally wrong? Let me know in the comments and I’ll see you all in a week for J’onn’s brother doing. . .something. Until then, stay super y’all.
Best Line of the Night:
Brainy: “This is no time for sarcasm, no matter how dry or well crafted. Supergirl’s cape is uniquely suited for the needs of high speed superhero maneuvers. And believe me, when a Fafarm-Faflax [maybe] is pursuing you across the poisonous prison pits of Takron-Galtos, you will wish for the heady days of olde, when your cape allowed you an easy sharp right turn. Oh yes!”
